WEEGEE FOUND DEAD
~story by ace reporter Toadofisky~

This is a sad day for all the Mushroom Kingdom. No doubt you've heard ot the Mario brothers. Plumbers that claim they're from another world--in this reporter's humble opinion, they've had too many of Toad's mushrooms!--and who have saved our humble kingdom from the genocidal kappa-like creatures we call the koopas. Soon afterward Mario went on to live with our beloved Peach Toadstool. But what of Luigi?

Luigi continued managing the plumbing service for a while before setting out for distant lands. We sat down with him before he departed for one of the neighboring kingdoms and had a chance to ask some questions. Our first was about what prompted Luigi to leave his steady business for an uncertain venture. He said: "Well Toadofisky, he {Mario} obviously found "his thing" when he saved our Princess Peach Toadstool from the clutches of Bowser Koopa. Sure, I tagged along. But I was constantly asking myself, "is this what I want to do? Why am I here?" Well, I found that when I heard from a traveller in the Dinosaur Lands about a nearby kingdom."

When asked, Luigi would not reveal the name of the kingdom, only that "his Daisy" was waiting. In fact, the case was closed. He left and it was back to business as usual. During his absence the Mushroom Kingdom was plagued by gossip about a "half-mad plumber with a deadly stare that had driven people mad. Rumors said it could induce suicide, spontaneous combustion, and strike Chuck Norris dead with a single glance. Descriptions matched our former hero Luigi Mario.

After his jaunt to the other kingdom, we caught up with a Luigi. A much different Luigi. He seemed distraught and dismayed. When asked about his condition he would only say: "That flickersauceing yoshi ruined it all"

We left it at that. What Yoshi did, we can only speculate. A year later Luigi--or WEEGEE as witness Blackholes_Wolf called him--was found partially devoured and with a melted face. A team of toads was sent to the nearby land of Alagaesia for the dragon rider Murtagh who used socererous powers to resurrect Luigi's brain.

Even as I enter this editorial into the worprocessor, a rather annoying user is screaming "WEEGEE HIS NAME IS WEEGEE!111!"

Dragon rider Murtagh was able to scry this image from Luigi--or Weegee's--brain:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ob5IjtGe7nE

We at the Mushroom Times must warn you: DO NOT LET IT SEE YOU! As you can see from the image, it can unhinge its jaw if necessary...if its WEEGEE KILLING STARE is not enough.

So as we mourn the death of our beloved plumber and hero, let us not let down our guard only to meet the same fate as he did.